By David Hahklotubbe, gerontologist

Guilt, Denial, Loss, Grief, Self-doubt, Shame, Disappointment, Confusion, Projection, Cognitive Dissonance, Paranoia, Anger……. FEAR. 

These are common “companions” for those seeking care for their elderly loved ones.  And, unfortunately, because the average American shies away from being proactive about addressing the mortality of their beloved parent or spouse, these “companions” are only amplified in intensity when decisions are being made while facing crisis.

Because most begin their search only after a serious incident, the typical American does not perform due diligence, contacting on average, 6 providers and only visiting 2 before making this important decision.  Worse, many delegate this important process to a third party, like a “Placement Agency”, who is paid handsomely to fill occupancies for providers who are struggling to fill their openings based upon reputation and word of mouth alone.

As if this journey wasn’t already complicated enough, the large senior care providers are fully aware of your situation, your “companions”….. and your resulting vulnerability.  As a Gerontologist, my quest is very simple, to create a quality of life for our elderly population.  When I entered into the field of senior care, I was blown away that I was alone, surrounded by providers who had no formal education on caring for seniors, mainly folks with backgrounds in hospitality, hotel/restaurant management or business administration.  Secondly, as part of my training, I was shipped off to sales seminars.  That is when my jaw fell open and stayed open for an entire week.

While I will say that there were a few caring, kind and empathic souls in the room, we were greatly outnumbered by those who sought one thing, CASH, through commissions and bonuses.  Sadly, through my 23-year career, I’ve discovered very little difference from provider to provider.

The gurus of corporate sales for senior living have carefully developed techniques to attract and sell their services to vulnerable decision-makers with targeted precision.  They have mastered the art of illusion by “getting into your circle of trust” and then closing you by pretending to be empathically offering you a “solution” to your situation.  This is done by sleight of hand, often over-promising and abusing the newly established trust by lulling the decision-maker into complacency.  And, ironically, they can’t seem to figure out why they have issues with occupancy.

In addition to having the wonderful advantage of not only being one of the very few in my field with a formal education of my practice, is the immense amount of lessons learned over 23 years of experience.  The most valuable lessons are not gleaned from what works, but from what doesn’t work, and not replicating the failures.  Sonnet Hill is founded upon one basic concept, to do the right thing.  We consciously hired our sales team based on knowledge, empathy and ethics.  None of our team are trained sales experts, we are compassionate purveyors of quality of life standing with confidence behind our services.  So bring your “companions” and come join us, we will walk along-side you and your elder upon your journey, together as a team.